The Reflection: The Father has had me in a time of reflection recently where I have sat and looked back on all the past few seasons that have led up to where I am currently at now. Not in a time of wanting to go back to the past but mostly in just reflecting back and seeing all the places where He was so very present along the way and to see just how far He has carried me. I am so thankful for even the hard things because it has helped me see the areas where I needed Him the most as well as grow me spiritually and be fully dependent on Him. Even though my heart is saddened about some things as I reminisce about the sweet memories of past family, friendships, and other connections that have been lost along the way or where they couldn't go where He has and is taking me and my family. It's a very bittersweet feeling and if I would have told myself years back that I would be where I am right now, I don't think I would have believed me and I'm sure I will say the same thing again down the road. One thing is for sure life has its way of throwing you curve balls and it pretty much never goes the way you think it's going to go. Ever.
Time has flown by so quickly. The realization of knowing that my kids are almost full grown, and it won't be too much longer they will begin lives of their own is mind blowing to me. I know that all parents begin to feel all these things at this stage in life but it is a hard one to walk through for sure especially when you are the one walking through it. It is true when they say to take it all in because it is gone in a blink and they aren't lying. As I have spent time with the Lord I have cried out to Him my concerns because I worry about what will be left for them when I'm gone. There isn't much that I can give them here physically, but I am praying that they will be left with Kingdom treasures that have been and are being built up. If there is anything He is teaching me in this season it is to fully surrender to Him the one's I love and other areas of my life. I know that, that there is only so much that I can do and I know I have to trust God with the rest.
'“And I will compensate you for the years That the swarming locust has eaten, The creeping locust, the stripping locust, and the gnawing locust— My great army which I sent among you. “You will have plenty to eat and be satisfied And praise the name of the Lord your God Who has dealt wondrously with you; And My people shall never be put to shame. 'Joel 2:25-26 I have been hearing this in my spirit for over a year now or maybe even longer. I've lost track of time it seems. What do I feel was stolen from me? Well, my time with my family over the years, my joy, my peace, relationships, finances, ministry, my health, and a lot of other things but I am going to spare everyone all the details lol I just keep holding this word in my heart believing that in Gods due time that all these things will be restored back to me double fold. And I know God doesn't lie. There are some things that I know He is doing underneath the surface, and I have some peace in knowing that but I would be lying if I said the waiting has been easy. The hallway season is never easy.
The Release: One of the hardest things to do is learning to let go and let God. Our flesh tends to want to have control and to hang on to things the Father calls us to release, both the good and the bad, but it isn't until we do release those things to Him and be obedient to what He tells us to do for the season He has us in, is when we begin to see Him move in our situations. We give Him permission and room to work. So, I am learning to release things that I have had the hardest time learning to let go of and in some areas forcing the door to stay open. I've had to repent of that. Over the last month and in truth even way before that now, looking back, I have been given so many confirmations on the current shifting and the next transition of me and my family's life that pertains to new ways of provision, new locations, new assignments, & new alignments for the next season. It's only gotten more and more prominent with each day and with every time spent in the quiet place. And though I don't know what the future holds I know who holds my future and I have to have faith and peace in that.
Harder times are ahead, that is inevitable, but as we all remain sensitive and obedient to the voice of the Holy Spirit, keeping our eyes fixed on Jesus, continuously seeking Him , our minds renewed and our hearts pure, and having discernment in not allowing the enemy to distract us than we will be right where He wants us to be for our safety and for our good, for His Kingdom, for His purposes, and for His Glory . He will never leave us nor forsake us and will have us all right on time. And for those of us who may have gotten off the path and off track, we have to have faith that He will get us right back on track. Because He loves us that much. He's a good, good Father!
So, as I reflected, I released, and so the Journey continues....
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